Once upon a time in a faraway land called Washington there lived a man named B. O. Bama. And B. O. Bama did indulge in much corruption and abomination and did refuse to bathe himself so that he came to emit a vile and displeasing aroma. And the people said, "What is that awful stink coming from Washington?"
So B.O. went to his friend, Hillary Klingon and said, "What must I do to rid myself of this stench?" And Hillary Klingon said, "We must lie to the people, for if the people are made to believe there is no stench, the stench will not exist." So they lied to the people, but the lies were so inept that the people said, "Why are you lying to us? And why is the stink getting stronger?"
So B.O. went to his friend Giggles Biden and said, "Giggles, what must I do to rid myself of this stench?" And Giggles Biden said, "We must take away from the people their guns, for if the people have no guns, they cannot come to Washington and wash away the stench." So B. O. tried to take away the people's guns, but the people said, "No go, B. O. For if we give you our guns, we shall have no protection against the stink from Washington."
So B. O. went to his friend Skank Pelossi and said, "Skank, what must I do to rid myself of this stench?" And Skank Pelossi said, "Stench? What stench? You smell just fine to me, B. O."
So B. O. went to his friend Jay Carnybarker and said, "Jay Carnybarker, what must I do to rid myself of this stench?" And Jay Carnybarker said, "We must pretend the stench does not exist, for if we censor the stench, the people will not know of it." So they did not talk of the stench, but the people said, "Eeeew! The stench is getting worse."
So B. O. went to his friend Lurch Kerry and said, "Lurch, what must I do to rid myself of this stench?" And Lurch Kerry said, "We must attack Syria, for if the people are distracted by a war, they will not notice the stench." But the people said, "Are you nuts!? We have no business sending our boys to die in Syria! And when are you going to do something about that stink? It seems to be getting even worse."
So B.O. went to his wife Marie Antoinette Bama and said, "Marie Antoinette, what must I do to rid myself of this stench?" And Marie Antoinette Bama said, "We must starve the people. Let them eat Kale. For if the people are weak from starvation they will not be aware of the stench." But the people said, "You can take away our rights and freedoms, but by Ned you're not gonna take away our cheeseburgers and french fries." And the people did rise up and march on Washington and they threw B. O. Bama into the Potomac and did scrub him with sand soap and wire brushes until the stench was gone.
Moral: You can't get rid of your stink by rolling in more shit.